R.I.P. old friend April 26, 2010
Posted by joedob in general.1 comment so far
“Nothing Lasts Forever”
Many years ago (well over 20), I first ventured out of my safe, secure world of “Big Iron” & embarked on my endless journey into the world of personal computers. With much anguish, I had begun my task of learning a new type of computer. One that, as fate would have it, would change my life forever, but not necessarily for the better. So, with corporate credit card in hand, I went to the most accesible place I could find… PC WAREHOUSE.
As I walked in, I was immediately taken back the the plethora of new, shiny equipment, all of which was foreign to me. “I gotta find someone to help”, I thought. At this point, another revelation came to me.. EVERYONE IN THE PLACE WAS CHINESE. Had I taken a wrong turn & entered Wong’s Egg Foo Yung Palace? A quick appraisal proved that not to be the case. So I walked around listening intently to find someone who spoke a reasonable dialect of English. I singled out the sole person with this marvelous ability.
“Can you help me?” Sure. Not too long into the conversation, I realized that, although this person spokeEnglish, it was not the brand I was used to. I thought I was watching Wheel of Fortune. This person used every acronym in the book, & a number of which I had never heard & felt sure were bogus.
An hour later, I walked out, the proud owner of that day’s current technology… A brand new 486 machine with 8K of RAM, 500MB of HDD storage, a new SVGA 14″ monitor, keyboard, mouse & a shitload of cables. A powerhouse in it’s day.
Thus began my trek into the dark recesses of what would become the thorn in the side of every computer technician for that day. It is a trek that continues, even today.
Which brings me to today. I arrive at work, turn on the trusty old friend in my office, & proceed to start my daily routine. However, today was not to be like every other day in my humdrum life. After distributing the company daily reports, & making my morning tea, I return to my office only to find a dark screen where my faithful friend usually greets me. Realize that this old, reliable system contains the ever popular, albeit defunct, LOTUS 123 (DOS version release 2.3) software which I use to summarize the previous day’s activity for my employer. After calming myself down, & trying a vast number of fixes, I come to realize that the system is, as is the registered owner of LOTUS 123, DEAD ! Panic turns to resolve. OK, the hardware is dead, but the data on the drive should still be intact. A quick scan of the office revealed my salvation. A “new” machine. I must qualifiy the term “NEW”. New, in this context, means working. There, in the corner of my office, currently functioning as an end table, was another, more modern machine. This system was a speedy 586, with 512KB of memory. The rest of the components are irrelavant, since they’re never going to be used. I perform a quick surgical extraction of the original hard drive & transplant it into the new system, connect all the wires & cables & turn on my latest creation. Click, Click, Whirr, Whirr, & soon my replacement computer is ready to pick up where it’s predecessor left off.
While many of you are astounded by this feat of magic (as was I), realize that the old system, as well as the new, is running on an antiquated version of DOS (disk operating system 6.0). No fancy windows, no mouse, no blue screeen of death. Just a fully functional machine, ready to do my bidding.
So now, after a brief period of mourning, I will say a final farewell to my trusted old friend. You’ve served me well these many years. Now go join your other deceased amigos in the electonic landfill of peace. You will be sorely missed. SNIFF, SNIFF
The good ole days- Take 2 February 2, 2010
Posted by joedob in personal.3 comments
“How much is TOO much?”
With the advent of a new year, I begin to accumulate thoughts, facts, files and stuff deemed revelant to a new beginning. After a prescribed amount of time, in this case 1 month, I’ve stored enough data that I feel compelled to start the unheard of task of “BACKING UP” my stuff. Since I don’t consider too much to be relevant, the quantity of stuff I have is not very large, so backing it up “should” be fairly simple. The operative word in the last thought is “SHOULD”.
For those of you too young, inexperienced, or senile, at one time, the accepted method of backup was a small, plastic device about 3.5 inches square with a magnetic media inside. This device was called a FLOPPY DISK, although it was not very floppy. By today’s standards, the venerable floppy was miniscule, holding a meer 1.44MB of data. By comparison, today’s DVD’s can store over 7GB, or about 5000 times a much stuff.
The reason for the history lesson is that in order to quickly know what’s on the floppy, a label was affixed to the front, & the contents of the disk handwritten on the label. Archaic, I grant you, but functional. So this morning, while at work running our end of month process, I decided to “backup” the 1st month of the new year. Confidently inserting the disk, I successfully copied all my stuff to the floppy and began to search for the aforementioned label. Finding a label was simple. Finding a label that was not so old that the glue hadn’t dried up was was not. I frantically tore apart my office, only to find that I did not have a non-dried up label. The engineering part of my brain kicked into high gear, & the solution became obvious… “SCOTCH TAPE”. I carefully applied said solution to my newly created backup & VOILA!!! IT WORKED.
My pride slowly turned to anguish as I realized that in computers, as in life, the aging process dries up old, unneeded entities, & does not replace them. Is this my fate? Will I dry up & not be replaced? Will my tried & true technology (IBM AS/400) wither away in nothing, & become just an unusable memory to be laughed at? Only time will tell.
May you always December 9, 2009
Posted by joedob in Uncategorized.add a comment
Quite some time ago, the was a DJ named Harry Harrison who appeared on many radio stations. Every year at this time, he would recite his Christmas wish which always moved me. Since Harry is no longer on the radio, I thought I’d include the words from this wish.
MAY YOU ALWAYS
As holiday bells ring out the old year, and sweethearts kiss,
And cold hands touch and warm each other against the year ahead
May I wish you not the biggest and best of life,
But the small pleasures that make living worthwhile.
Sometime during the new year, to keep your heart in practice,
May you do someone a secret good deed and not get caught at it
May you find a little island of time to read that book and write that letter
And to visit that lonely friend on the other side of townMay your next do-it-yourself project not look like you did it yourself
May the poor relatives you helped support remember you when they win the lottery
May your best card tricks win admiring gasps and your worst puns, admiring groans
May all those who told you so, refrain from saying “I told you so.”
May all the predictions you’ve made for your firstborn’s future come true
May just half of those optimistic predictions that your high school annual made for you come true
In a time of sink or swim, may you find that you can walk to shore before you call the lifeguard
May you keep at least one ideal you can pass along to your kids.For a change, some rainy day, when you are a few minutes late
May your train or bus be waiting for you
May you accidentally overhear someone saying something nice about you
If you run into an old school chum
May you both remember each other’s names for introductions
If you order your steak medium rare, may it be so
And if you’re on a diet
May someone tell you “You’ve lost a little weight,” without knowing you’re on a diet.May that long and lonely night be brightened by the telephone call that you’ve been waiting for
When you reach into the coin slot, may you find the coin that you lost on your last wrong number
When you trip and fall, may there be no one watching to laugh at you or feel sorry for you
And sometime soon may you be waved to by a celebrity
Wagged at by a puppy
Run to by a happy child
And counted on by someone you love
More than this, no one can wish you.
October 8, 2009
Posted by joedob in general.add a comment
“What’s in a name?”
Many years ago (circa 1969), when I first ventured into what is now my livelihood, acronyms always meant only one thing. e.g. IBM meant International Business Machines, PTF was Program Temporary Fix, MFCM was known to be the ever-tempermental Mult-Function Card Machine. (If you’re to young to know that a card was an input medium, please schedule a trip to the Smithsonian before continuing).
In those days, RPG translated into Report Program Generator, a structured programming language for IBM (see above) mainframe computers. That was 40 years ago & the language is still going strong among us “Old Timers”. So imagine my surprise, when during a recent visit to Barnes & Noble, I happened upon RPG Programming Using XNA Being the naive elder that I am, I thought it was a guide for mainframe RPG.
Imagine my surprise, when I opened the book, and nothing looked even vaguely familiar. As I continued to read, I found that RPG, in this case, did not refer to my beloved programming language, but RPG stood for Role Player Game. While my son & his buddies are heavily into online gaming, I draw the line at anything more complex than PONG. And the thought of programming an online game gave me a headache which is still with me today. I immediately placed the reference manual back into it’s cozy spot on the shelf, treated myself to a Starbucks hot chocolate, & went home to try to determine exactly when I lost touch with current technology.
My biggest concern now is what other acronyms that I thought I knew, have taken on new & sinister meanings? Is NFL still National Football League, or does it have some diabolical interpretation that I’ll only find by accident?
Spoiled August 5, 2009
Posted by joedob in personal.add a comment
“You don’t know what you have, until it’s gone”
It’s amazing how spoiled we as humans get. What start out as “conveniences”, soon evolve into “necessities”. Case in point, yesterday, I needed to leave my SUV at the dealership for repairs. (Ridiculously expensive, but that’s for another post) Since my presence here at work is almost mandatory, and my wife needs her car today, I was forced into renting transportation.
The rental experience was almost painless. (Again, fodder for another rant). I dropped the car off at the dealership and left it overnight so work(?) can begin bright and early this morning. After filling out the required repair documents, I was ready to get into my shiny replacement. Enterprise car rental commercials happily tout their pick up and drop off service, which I obviously used.
The rental agent showed up within 2 minutes, and we returned to the agency. After completing the necessary forms, I was ready to hop into my temporary transportation. Since I’m not exactly a spend-thrift, I opted for the least expensive model available. Upon climbing into my new little toy, I began to understand how clowns feel. The vehicle is about the size of a clown car in the circus, but since it’s only me, no big deal.
Now I proceed to familiarize myself with location of the vital controls. Windows… hmm, no button… Oh yeah, I vaguely remember in days gone by, that one lowered the car windows with a crank. Ah, there it is… OK… not too bad. Seat adjustment…. hmm… again, no button… feeling around under the seat, and praising Allah that I didn’t find any gooey, foreign surprises, I found the release lever. BAM !!!!! I’m now sitting in the trunk ! OK, let’s try this again SLOWLY. Ah, relative comfort at last. OK, let’s go. ZOOM !!!!!!!! Oops, this car has pickup, not used to that. OK.. now I have the hang of this.
After a short ride home, I park, remove the ignition key, exit the car, noting no other occupants followed, and realize… NO LITTLE BUTTON. This car doesn’t have automatic locks. Now what? In a prior lifetime, I used to lock the car door by pushing down the doorlock button, hold the handle, shut the door and the car remained locked. WRONG !!!! That just didn’t allow me to close the door. AHA !!! Going further back in time, I remembered that at one time, you close the door, insert the ignition key into a little hole on the door handle, turn the key and lock the door. VOILA !!!! Success again. However, this same inane routine must be repeated for EACH of the remaining 3 doors.
So another of life’s lesson re-inforced.. YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR!!!! Go for inexpensive (read CHEAP), and you relinquish the rights to privileges previously taken for granted. How quickly we forget the way things were back in the STONE AGES, before all of today’s modern conveniences.
The good ole days July 30, 2009
Posted by joedob in personal.2 comments
“What did we do before computers?”
For those of you who don’t live in this area, and don’t have access to weather or news reports, it’s been horrific these past few days. Severe storms have been wrecking havoc throughout the Garden State, complete with heavy rain, high winds, tornadic activity and the ever popular power outages.
Such was the case last night. We had just finished feasting on Shake N Bake pork chops, cleaned the few dishes and pots, and I had cozily settled into my comfy recliner to partake in my favorite pasttime ”Mindless TV”. Recently, I’ve taken an interest in an inane show called WIPEOUT, where various contestants risk life and limb to pursue the grand prize of $50,000. Albeit, a fine undertaking, the torture inflicted by the sadistic producers of this show nowhere near compensates for the physical pain and suffering.
But I digress. The show was almost over, the 1st team had set the benchmark time to beat, and the 2nd team was on their way. It was at this point that Mother Nature showed her mean streak. As I found myself rooting for the current competitors, BANG!!! A loud clap of thunder, a bright flash of lightning, and darkness. Was it Armaggedon? Had the world come to an end? Was it ’The Big One’? No, just JCP&L. We lost power.
After a few minutes of darkness, a change of underwear, and a re-evaluation of the situation, I realized everything was OK. Or was it? Granted, I would never know who actually won the grand prize, but since I wasn’t in the running for $50,000, no big deal. The next blazing question was: What do I do now? No power means no internet, no TV for DVD playback, no light for reading (not really an option), no computer, NOTHING but solitude.
So, after making a mental note to keep my laptop battery charged at all times, I proceeded to do the only logical thing that was available to me: GO TO SLEEP. Mental note #2: after a power outage, shut off all ligths and TV’s. Power was restored within about 20 minutes (YAY JCP&L), and since everything was left status quo before the outage, all lights, TV’s and alarms came to life. I was able to resume the mindless pasttime of TV watching, just in time to catch the evening news and receive a recap of what I just personally witnessed.
Fortunately, this is not a regular occurence, but it does give one pause to ponder the reliance we all have on electricity and the many conveniences it affords us. It also brings to light the need for contingency plans in the event of another such occurence… Install a gas powered generator !!!!!
Coincidence? July 20, 2009
Posted by joedob in general.add a comment
“It’s a small world after all, it’s a small, small, world”
This past Saturday, my wife & I had tickets to a production of ‘The Producers’ at the Count Basie Theater in Red Bank. Now, the Phoenix Group, a non-profit team of amater actors & actrsses, puts on ONLY 4 productions a year, & this was the 2nd this year. (We missed the 1st) Prior to the play, which by the way was fantastic, we met friends, who also attended the play, for dinner.
After indulging in a great Italian feast, which I paid for the rest of the evening, we still had about an hour to kill before the start of the production. So, since we always eat at the same place and are getting antsy for a change, we decided to search the surrounding area for a new feeding trough.
After an unsuccessful attempt to find someplace new, we, & decided to head back to pick up my wife who had to sit out most of the expedition with a bad back. Upon crossing over to head back up the street, I, for some unknown reason, glanced to my left & found myself peering into the large window of an eatery which looking intriguing, but escaped my eagle eye before. At that moment, who should I see in the restaurant, but MY SON. Now, realize that my wife & I only go to this particular city 4 times a year. Also realize that my son frequents it even less. It’s been too many years since college, so I won’t even attempt to figure out the probability of us running into each other, given the infrequency of both parties visits.
My son, after noticing not his father, but my walking companions, immediately temporarily deserted his friends & came out to say hello. Seems they had just ordered their meals, so he had time to run out & visit. We walked the half block to join up with my wife, who was just as surprised as I was to see my son. We both laughed at the thought of what was goung through the minds of his buddies, as he quickly rose from the table & darted out to meet us, with little or no explanation to his dining companions.
The ultimate moral of this post is:
Be careful where you go & who you’re with. You NEVER KNOW who you’ll run into.
Need for Speed July 14, 2009
Posted by joedob in general.add a comment
“No matter how fast you go, it’s NEVER fast enough“
Truer words were never spoken when dealing with computers. This fact has become painfully obvious over the past few weeks. It has always been true that when a new system or processor is announced, it’s always faster, sleeker, and more powerful than it’s predecessor. Now, with the advent of FiOS, DSL, & cable, and 1GB network cards, communication speeds have reached lightning speed.
Now, in an effort to save money in these budget tightening times, I recently took a look at our company network costs & found they were astonomical. (Thanks AT&T) After much research, I found that replacing our existing T1 lines with a hodge-podge of protocols, I could save about $5000 per month. Elated with these new found savings, I immediately began the daunting task of throwing out the old, & bringing in the new. But a funny by-product of today’s techonology quickly became apparent… The new network runs SIGNIFICANTLY faster.
In it’s day, T1 lines were the fastest thing around, & it was with great pride that I bragged to all that would listen about our state of the art network technology. As time passed, & we added more drops to our network, things slowed down, not dramatically, but enough. Advances quietly occurred, & soon, our hi-tech lines were as antiquated as their owner. So now, we have the latest new, bright & shiny technology.
However, the improvements came with a price. I now find myself impatiently waiting at home during my web surfing escapades, cursing at the snail-like downloads I’m suffering through. My company is advancing into the 21st century, while I’m locked in last millenia’s “2 cups & a string” at home.
Someday, FiOS will be available in my home area. Until then, as the infamous commercial goes, I’ll be waiting while my internet connection is “buffering, buffering, buffering”.
TwEnglish July 7, 2009
Posted by joedob in general.add a comment
“‘Twas brillig, and the slithy toves Did gyre and gimble in the wabe; All mimsy were the borogoves, And the mome raths outgrabe.”
While this passage from the poem Jabberwocky may seem like nonsense, it comes to mind when listening to my adorable granddaughter talk. Most times, her chatter makes perfect sense, if you can fill in the holes with actual words. But in her own way, she gets her point accross.
Her latest “cute-ism” is in her reference to us. Originally, we (the paternal grandparents) were Ma & Pa, which explains the blog title. However recently, Ma had morphed into Mee-Ma. I remained “Pa”, until last Thursday. It was then that I began my slow transformation to Pee-Pa. So now, instead of Ma & Pa, we’ve become Mee-Ma & Pee-Pa.
I’m assuming that, in time, we will ultimately emerge from our granddaughter’s loving cocoon to become grandma & grandpa, but for now, we will remain Mee-Ma & Pee-Pa.
Time marches on June 25, 2009
Posted by joedob in general.add a comment
“Time passes as sand through an hourglass”
While sitting, waiting for last night’s processing to complete, I mentally review my life. Since today is my wedding anniversary, I reflect back on how things have changed in these past 32 years.
I’ve gone from carefree bachelor, to “responsible” husband, proud father & most recently, doting grandfather. I’ve made too many job changes to remember them all, each one furthering my “illustrious” career. Proudly watched my 2 off-spring grow from needy babies to self-sufficient, successful adults, surpassing all my hopes & dreams for them.
But I can’t help but wonder what’s next. As I always say, I’m at that awkward age… Too young to retire, and too old to work as hard as I do. With retirement within reach (less than 5 years), I wonder if I’ll just curl up in a corner & wait for father time to take his last steps with me. Will I follow in the steps of my mom & dad, & enjoy my “senior” years, travelling with my life companion. Will I be able to put away the work-a-day routine & enjoy what I’ve worked so hard for my entire life? Only time will tell.
For now, I’ll just remember the past, enjoy the present, & hope for the best in the future.
